The problem is that she seems to have believed the advertising blurb about them being special. So, for example, crisps flavoured with "Sea Salt And Malt Vinegar" are worth more than the good old "salt and vinegar" crisps she's been eating for years. Similarly "Four Cheese And Red Onion" apparently tastes SO MUCH better than "Cheese and Onion". And "Oven Roasted Chicken And Thyme" is infinitely more desirable than simply "Chicken" flavoured crisps. I've tried to explain that they're still just crisps (i.e. they are thinly sliced, fried pieces of potato which have been covered in flavouring) but she's taking some convincing.

But the arguments (oops, sorry, DISCUSSIONS) have made me think.

For many years I was a Methodist. In fact, until my well-documented fall from faith, I was destined for the Methodist ministry (as Dad said, "You'll be poor but you'll always have a roof over your head and they've never let one starve yet!") Returning to faith, I was uneasy about rejoining the Methodist fold and chose, instead, to be confirmed into my wife's denomination - so I'm now an Anglican.

Now, to many, the Church Of England is the HIGH Church. Anglicanism (posh crisps) or Methodism (ordinary crisps) - see where I'm going here? Now I know that's not true - I would run a mile from any church that told me I must pray in THEIR way and that THEIR way is the ONLY way to have a relationship with Jesus. OK! Let me explain it in a slightly more fun form.

Imagine you're in Heaven, sitting near to God as the prayers start to roll in. Does He say the following to his Heavenly host?

GABRIEL: "INCOMING!!!!!!"

GOD: "OK lads, you know the drill! Anglicans first because you know how they get discouraged if their prayers aren't answered immediately. We'll do the Catholics next because there's so many of 'em - once they're out of the way it'll be downhill from there. Today’s rota says Methodists before Baptists - we'll switch 'em back tomorrow so that they don't think we're favouring one or the other. We’ll fit the rest in "as and when" like normal!"

Now I may not have a very clear idea of what Heaven is actually like, but I do know it's not like some sort of giant "mail sorting office" with prayers being shuffled and re-sorted into an appropriate 'merit' order. Are my prayers any less, or any more, valid as an Anglican than they were as a Methodist? Of course not.

Many people will present you with their own particular 'Brand' of Jesus which they claim is 'better' than the rival brands. But simply remember that THERE IS ONLY ONE JESUS and He never changes, despite what others tell you. Your path is just as valid as anybody else's.

(c)Conway Billington